dbskyler

It all started when a friend of mine happened to mention the language-learning site Duolingo (www.duolingo.com). I was immediately drawn to how addictive it was, how fun it was, and how free it was. Ironically, I first wanted to improve my Spanish, as that is the foreign language I had been using (trying to use) the most. But I also took French in high school, and soon I couldn't resist using Duolingo to find out how much French I remembered. I quickly discovered that I had lost a lot of it -- in fact, Duolingo's test took me right back to the beginning, "Basics 1" -- but I also discovered that it started to come back to me, and the more I progressed through Duolingo's lessons, the more lessons I was able to test out of. I am now two lessons away from completing all of Duolingo's French lessons, and I am at least as good at French as when I took it in high school, and possibly even better.

Besides Duolingo, I have been able to practice my French with lots of other free resources on the internet. In fact, it's amazing how many resources are out there if you go and look. Here are my favorites so far:

-- Watching episodes of a French anime series, "Les Aventures de Ladybug et Chat Noir" (The Adventures of Ladybug and Black Cat). I have primsong to thank for this; she recommended this show and it is both charming and addictive to watch. I watch in French with English subtitles, although I sometimes watch without the subtitles just to gauge how good I am at picking up the French without the translation. (Not too good yet, but improving.) The episodes can be found on youtube.

-- A site that has you watch French music videos and fill in pieces of the lyrics. Sometimes there are technological hiccups (asking for the word before the video played the word; not allowing you to type in apostrophes while requiring apostrophes for the correct answer), but it's so much fun, I have to list it here. Also, the site has introduced me to the French musical group "Carrousel," and I now love their music, especially the song "Le Manque De Place." Here's the site: http://www.bonjourdefrance.com/karaoke-fle/index.php/fr

-- Reading fanfic in French on AO3. So far, I have read several French Doctor Who fanfics and a few Marvelous Ladybug fanfics (i.e., Les Aventures de Ladybug et Chat Noir). I have also managed to comment on the fics in French, although you'll have to ask the authors how comprehensible I was. Anyway, it's another great way to strengthen my reading comprehension with material that I'm actually interested in reading.

Pokemongo is huge here. Everyone seems to be playing it. Went for a walk, and the world was full of people staring down at their phones.

Meanwhile, I can't get the game yet because the server keeps crashing.

I am bereft of pokemon.

I am okay with that.

For now.

(Where is the game that lets me collect Doctor Who characters? I would go crazy for that one.)

Don't worry, I'm not suicidal. But, I did just come back from a memorial for a friend who committed suicide. And so I've been thinking about him, and about the mental state that leads to committing suicide, and I feel I have to write about it.

My friend planned his suicide. He left messages -- lots of different messages, for lots of different people -- and one of the things he said in his messages was that he knew his suicide would cause pain, and that the people he loved, and the people whom he knew loved him, had kept him alive, and that if it weren't for that connection, he would have committed suicide long ago. But now it was too much, now he wanted to end his suffering, and while he knew help was available, he was deliberately choosing not to seek it out.

I didn't know this friend very well. In truth, I am probably stretching things by using the word "friend"; he was more of an acquaintance, and a mutual friend of other friends, and I had had no idea that he even struggled with depression, let alone to this extent. That was one of the things he said in his suicide notes, too -- that he had become good at mimicking happiness because he didn't want to inject his unhappiness into interactions with others.

And I think about the times when I've been depressed in my life, and I realize I've done the same. There have been times when I was severely, deeply depressed, and no one knew. When you're in that state, reaching out is the very last thing you want to do, and even if you know intellectually that it might help you, your emotions tell you that it won't -- that it will only cause unhappiness to others, and stress to yourself at a time when you absolutely cannot bear one more iota of emotional pain -- and so you curl in, and instead you just endure. If you're lucky, then, like in my case, the depression eventually lifts, and you come out again. And you don't talk about it, at least not in any real, deep sense. You don't talk about it because it's uncomfortable to talk about, and worrying to friends and family, and even stigmatizing. But mostly you don't talk about it because there isn't really anything to talk about. There's no story to tell. There's just a feeling, something that encompassed you for a time and then went away -- or, as in the case of my friend, didn't go away, until he couldn't bear it any longer and made it go away using the only method he believed would work.

And so, in memory of my friend, I just want to say -- reach out. If you're depressed, and have nothing to say, then just say that you're feeling depressed, and have nothing else to say. If you're not depressed, reach out to the people around you. Check in with them, and find out how things are going -- try to find out how things are really going, moving beyond the shallow shorthand of "everything's fine." Try to reach beyond the mimicry.

Try to create a world where help is not only available to those who seek it, but already there to those who lack the capacity to seek it. Reach out, one person at a time.

Hello flist! Question for you -- what are your thoughts on the upcoming Scottish referendum on independence? Just curious.

I'm especially interested in hearing from those of you in the UK, but others are welcome to chime in if you like.

I've been reading the #yesallwomen Twitter hashtag and it's been simultaneously empowering and depressing.

One of the depressing things is that I would like to join in, but I don't feel comfortable doing so. Well, I also don't have a Twitter account, but I've spent a day now thinking about posting something to Facebook, and I just can't bring myself to do it. I don't want to face the responses I am likely to get. Which, ironically, underscores just how important this hashtag discussion is.

Anyway, if I were more courageous, here's what I would post there:

Because I have been sexually groped, without my consent, in public, by men who thought it was a funny joke. Multiple times. #yesallwomen

What responses do I not want to read? "Maybe they did mean it as a joke. Don't take it so seriously." "What do you mean by 'sexually groped'? Are you sure your boundaries aren't unreasonable?" "If it happened to you multiple times, you must've done something to provoke it."

And the really sad thing is, I am certain that almost every woman reading this has had the same thing happen to her, at one point or other in her life. Which is what men just don't understand. THIS IS NOT AN ABERRATION. THIS KIND OF THING HAPPENS TO ALL WOMEN. ALL THE TIME.

So today the U.S. Supreme Court heard oral arguments on Prop 8, the law that bans same-sex marriage in California. We won't hear the Court's decision for awhile -- somewhere or other I heard "June" mentioned -- but hopefully we are near the moment when Prop 8 will get overturned. And tomorrow, the Supreme Court hears arguments on the federal Defense of Marriage Act, which currently enshrines federal discrimination against gays and lesbians who are legally married in their states. Hopefully that will get tossed, too.

In the meantime, a lot of people are hanging out on the Supreme Court steps with posters. Of all the pictures I've seen, this is my favorite:

In honor of the fact that today it is BOTH Christmas and Hanukkah (which, FYI, is very unusual), I bring you a video of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert singing about their respective winter holidays:



Happy holidays, everyone!

I am offering fanfic for the help_Japan auction at LiveJournal. My thread is HERE.

Now to see if anyone bids on me . . .

I'm struggling with RL a little bit right now, so I am turning to more fun things to think about. And what could be more fun to think about than my upcoming trip to London to see David Tennant and Catherine Tate in Much Ado About Nothing?

I'm thinking that I'll spend around two weeks in the UK total. Obviously a few days of that will be London. This may also be the trip where I finally make it to Penzance! And yes, I freely admit that 95% of my desire to go to Penzance is the G&S operetta, but I've heard that Cornwall is nice to visit, too. Besides, on my last trip I took a photo of the "Ealing" sign when we passed through the station on the train, and the person I was traveling with asked me what I was photographing, and I had to lie and say I saw something out the window. But of course, it was really about documenting that I had been through Ealing, setting of Sarah Jane Adventures! Maybe I should try for South Croydon this time? ; )

So, flist! I'm in the market for suggestions. Where else should I go? What should I do? What should I not miss? I will be there in early July, in case that makes a difference for your suggestions.

I don't usually get political on LJ, but I just happened across the most incredible comment to a news article about the new Arizona immigration law and I need to publicly poke at it.

( poking ahead )